Vague Insanty 036

Let's say I was mildly confused about the way that combustion engines work. I could take a class, and get a certificate, and work in a garage for 10 years until one weird day at random some young lady with an infant son named Kevin Julio Sanchez walked in and asked me to give her a damned good lube job.

We'd laugh, I'd accidentally think she was coming onto me, I'd grope her – there would be lawsuits, but then, mysteriously the charges would be dropped and I wouldn't get fired. Then, one day, about six months later, a woman with a flat tire and some bad spark plugs would ask if I wanted a blowjob.

This time though, I would be cautious, not wanting to make the same mistake and jump to conclusions. So she would return everyday with a minor car complaint that could be fixed in 2 minutes, then invite me to have dinner with her family. She would introduce me as her boyfriend and have her infant son, David Hermes Chang, call me "step daddy" and then, it would dawn on me.

10 years later, David Hermes Chang would blame me for ruining his life, the once beautiful girl who sabotaged her own car just to get to know me better would be an evil vindictive bitch pursuing a long and painful divorce case, and I would have turned to alcoholism to cope with the pain.

That's why I don't want to know about the combustion engine.