Vague Insanty 001

So let's say that you were given a lot of power and a small monkey to provide you with cigarettes on demand. Sure, there would be that momentary feeling of importance, of achievement, of not sucking, but then what? Where do you go from there? I mean, are you actually supposed to be competent or something, or can you just smile widely while setting fires to distract everyone's attention.

Like, let's say I was a homosexual porpoise. So I'm there eating fish and grooming myself, and trying to act like I'm the king of sea world, but other than some strange hunger for fish and an awkward attraction to porpoises of the same sex, what the hell have I got??

A lot of this might all be easier if only I was a small midget named Henry. Sure, people would pick on me, and throw me around, and ask me if I worked for Santa Claus, but there's a sort of built in limitation there. People don't expect a whole hell of a lot from the short people in this world. Maybe that's wrong, maybe it's sad and crazy, but if I was some tiny-ass midget I could be incompetent as hell and no one would notice.

But I'm kinda' tall. So people see me. And think that I eat ham sandwiches.
Which i do.
Sometimes.
But not alot.