Vague Insanty 067

It’s not like I actually know how to kick box or fly or do anything awesome like that; I just sit around, drinking coffee, reading newspapers with copious amounts of topless women, and think about how freaking weird Europe is.

I am Europe-boy now. It is time for me to embrace the viva of europa and walk down the cobbled alleys with a floppy hat and a really long and pointy stick of bread.

I will grow a thin moustache, and have sex with other men, but I will not be gay; I will just be a new wave European citizen with a small amount of pocket change and a strange love for instant coffee.

There will be cheese, yogurt, sausage, bacon, baked beans, marmalade, fried green tomatoes, burnt toast, orange slices, warm milk, and three-cheese biscuits -- and that's just breakfast.

Soon I will sing drunkenly in a small tavern and speak out against greed and money and general happiness. Then, I will donate my money and body to charity and speak with a strange lisp.

This is Euro-fashion and I am Pimp-boy Deluxe!